You Were Right, World: Finally Watching Friday Night Lights

I have finally watched an episode of Friday Night Lights. I feel like I just drank Brita water for the first time or just discovered the Internet.

Right off the bat, I’d like to thank Netflix and their genius online streaming for making this all happen. Yeah, Netflix…you know, recently associated with unwatched DVD’s sitting on your TV stand for a month or so before you simply decide to return them unopened because frankly, the desire to watch Due Date has passed. Prior to Netflix’s move to online streaming, it could easily be considered one of the biggest wastes of a marginal amount of money in modern history, with ESPN Insider accounts finishing second- a close second. But this online streaming thing? Genius.

So the Wife and I settled in last night, the Christmas tree lit and the house all roasty toasty adorable and cued up episode 1 of season 1 of Friday Night Lights. It was the start of a trial run, not just of Netflix, but of the show. My loving wife generally gives the thumbs up or thumbs down when it comes to what TV shows we’re going to embark on. She’s a tough critic- it’s one of things I love about her. Homeland was a rousing success, but I still have a questionable record due to my recommendation of the Newsroom, which didn't make it past two episodes. She would give Friday Night Lights three to four episodes, which I feel is totally understandable and reasonable. I already knew I was going to like it, but marriage is a partnership, so we both had to be on board.

Well, without getting into it, the first episode of Friday Night Lights is flippin’ unreal television. Pilot episodes are generally hit or miss and this is largely because they need to get a lot done without boring the shit out of you. I recently watched the first episode of the Sopranos- that’s a great first episode. The first episode of The Wire, it’s all right, but not as succinct as The Sopranos. The first episode of Lost is the mack daddy of pilot episodes in that it literally contains everything you need to get both massively hooked and instantly engrossed in it. After watching only ten minutes of Friday Night Lights I was in. I was in like I was upon first hearing Band of Horses or first drinking Yuengling. Essentially it was love at first sight. I’m smitten.

Everything is laid out right there for you- Coach Taylor is facing enormous pressure from both the town (to win football games, which he’s expected to do) and from his wife (to nab that house with the his and hers closets, because it’s the key to a happy marriage, which is something I can personally attest too.) The town of Dillon is football crazy, Riggins is the wild card, the blond chick is the female wild card, the running back is cocky as hell and the quarterback is the golden boy with the golden girl cheerleader. It wasn’t a surprise that in the first game the Panthers played their defense was a problem. We had no idea who any of the defensive players were- never a good sign. At least The Program had that crazy bastard Lattimer to remind you that defensive players are living, breathing people too. Then there’s the backup quarterback who fishes things on out the trash for his coach and has a nob of a friend who wants to start a Christian speed metal band. I don’t know all the names of everyone yet and refuse to look them up because of fear of spoilers. But they’re all there. I like the mayor, especially when she tells golden boy QB to listen to more Black Sabbath because it’ll “make ‘em mean.”

The music is perfect, the way the game is shot is perfect and the tone is perfect. Shit, the entire thing might be perfect. 

I went to bed last night thinking about what might happen next and was anxious to watch more episodes. I was hooked and I was stoked- stoked like a freakin' Bengal tiger stumbling upon a gang of tipsy water buffalo or Riggins demolishing a defensive line or a bottle of Jack Daniel's.

You were right, World, Friday Night Lights is an amazing television show. You were totally right all along. I never doubted you and if anything, feel ashamed it's taken me this long to get with the program. But I’m all in on Friday Night Lights after only episode and with a little luck, Wife is too.

Clear eyes, full heart, can’t lose…

33 Things I Know

Tomorrow I turn 33.

At this point in my life I don’t know everything there is to know- I only know some things. Things you know are absolute- they are facts as far as you are concerned. They are bases of discussion, conversation starters, conversation enders, and possibly points of contention. But ultimately they are simply enough, just the things you know.

Here are 33 things I know as of today, the day before I turn 33.

1. I know you can’t beat flip flops when it comes to foot wear.

2. I know the Red Sox will always be the team I care about the most, although this has been less rigid in the past couple years- with the Patriots & Celtics sneaking in there.

3. I know the difference between a $15 haircut and a $25 haircut.

4. I know the Wire is my favorite television show of all time. Arrested Development is second and the Office (prior to season 7) is third. Notable mentions are Lost, Madmen, Seinfeld and It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. In the next couple years I could see Boardwalk Empire and/or Game of Thrones cracking that list.

5. I know the best hat I ever owned was a green fitted Michigan State hat.

6. I know that after a while, you can get sick of drinking only water.

7. I know that the only state not on an ocean I could live in is Colorado.

8. I know the best job I ever had was being a deckhand at Casco Bay Lines.

9. I know I will always look fondly upon Isuzu Troopers.

10. I know I prefer black ink to blue ink, but I’m not entirely sure why.

11. I know that I really came to appreciate the city of Philadelphia.

12. I know my favorite baseball player of all time is Ryne Sandberg.

13. I know that I never thought I’d have a nickname with more staying power than Burns.

14. I know Life cereal will always be the best cereal there is and if you mix it with Honey Nut Cheerios, it’s a work of art.

15. I know beer tastes best in a cold bottle.

16. I know that sporting a handlebar moustache makes me look angry and troubled, regardless of what my mouth is doing.

17. I know the five best concerts I’ve been to are (in no particular order):
- Pearl Jam at the Spectrum in Philly
- My Morning Jacket at the Mann Center in Philly
- Phish’s midnight set on 1/1/00 at Big Cypress Indian Reservation in Florida
- U2 at the old Foxboro Stadium in Mansfield, Mass
- From Good Homes at the Recher Theater in Towson, Maryland

18. I know that life got easier when I stopped caring what everyone else thought.

19. I know that mix tapes are better than mix CD’s.

20. I know I wish I was five inches taller.

21. I know 75 to 83 degrees and sunny is where it’s at.

22. I know playing music for people is one of the best feelings there is.

23. I know Goucher College might not be for everybody, but it was for me and I have no regrets.

24. I know I actually do have one regret about Goucher and it’s that I wish I had done a semester abroad. I really wouldn’t have missed as much as I thought I would.

25. I know that at weddings I drink Gin & Tonics.

26. I know my favorite place I’ve been to in California is San Diego.

27. I know that someday I want to go to Europe and do the following: fly to London, travel to Ireland and then over to Scotland, then on to Norway & Sweden, followed by taking a boat to Poland, the Czech Republic, Germany, Holland, France, Portugal, Spain and finally taking another boat to Italy. If Greece was included, that’d be dope. But if not, it’s not a deal breaker.

28. I know that I can’t wait to have a dog.

29. I know that for me, coffee just does a job. Taste is secondary.

30. I know Portland, Maine is the greatest place in the world July through October.

31. I know that my next vehicle will be a SUV or a truck. Cars aren’t for me.

32. I know patience isn’t my strong point, but everyday I’m working on it.

33. I know I’m a lucky dude because I met Kim and I had to be lucky for that to happen.

That’s what I know.

Go Pats.

12 Thoughts for 2012: coffee mugs, lars ulrich, game of thrones & more.

Here’s twelve random and largely un-connected thoughts for 2012…

1. I’ve grown tired of the Republican Death Race for the Presidential nomination. Although I do appreciate Newt Gingrich employing the best and most massive BUT in recent memory when he said that he won’t go negative and won’t start throwing out attack ads…but (and that’s it) he does reserve the right to tell the truth. The translation: oh I’m going to get negative and it’s going to be awesome. Buckle up Mitt, Newt’s about to go nuclear on your Mormon ass!

2. I usually disagree with Sports Illustrated’s predictions about anything, but Peter King predicting a Saints over Patriots Super Bowl makes total sense to me. However, I do disagree with their use of regional covers. I don’t like them, especially because I don’t currently live in the region of the teams I’m a fan of. I live in Philly and get stuck with Pennsylvania-centric covers (no thanks Big Ben) and unless it’s a member of the Phillies, I could care less. I’m sure I’m not alone in thinking this. And it pains me that in the Colorado area, Sports Illustrated possibly had their third Tebow cover in the last five issues.

3. Van Halen played a club show in New York City last night and I watched two clips on YouTube. This led to me spending 15 minutes watching videos of drummers. The highlights- a four minute clip of Lars Ulrich awkwardly trying to find a drum beat for a fairly generic Metallica song and James Hetfield and Kirk Hammett trying not to shit on Ulrich, but at the same time, growing frustrated with his inability to get something together. I hate Lars Ulrich. Sit down you nancy boy. Drummers shouldn’t stand up unless they are coming or going. Have you ever seen Questlove stand up? No. Case closed.

4. I haven’t watched the NBA since Christmas day. There’s too much going on right now. But it’s nice to see the Celtics start to get some wins- albeit against some terrible teams. You know how the NBA can be saved? It’s easy, dude. Contract 4 teams…Sacramento, Charlotte, Milwaukee, and Toronto and move Memphis’ team to Chicago with that team getting first dibs on Charlotte and Milwaukee’s four best players. Boom. Two teams in Chicago would be great- the Chicago Grizzlies. That sounds like a winner.

5. An underrated awesome present for a man like me for Christmas? A new travel coffee mug. I got one and it’s awesome. It’s too early to say it might change my life, but there is a damn good chance.

6. It’s hard to pinpoint a new season of a show I’ve been more excited for that rivals my excitement for season two of Game of Thrones. The only show that could be considered would be the Wire season five, but that was for different reasons. I love the idea of six seasons of Game of Thrones and that this will only be the second. Of course if someone docks and union workers and dead Eastern European hookers are involved, we might have an issue.

7. I can teach you how to write a good email. I can also teach you how to parallel park.

8. It’s No Beer-uary with the only exceptions being Patriots playoff games and this Saturday if we go see See-I, a reggae band from DC, at Union Transfer in Philly.

9. I think we need a holiday in late February or early March. I’m not sure if it should be a gift-giving holiday or a big-eating holiday or a costume-up & booze-up holiday, but we need something to break up this dangerous stretch of time we’re about to embark on. Either that or we could just get rid of March as a whole and with respect to people with March birthdays, we give them their choice of either moving their birthday to February or April and then we move St. Patrick’s Day to mid-August where it can then serve as one big throwdown before the summer ends. This allows for a more relaxing Labor Day weekend where we can concentrate on important things like bar-be-ques and fantasy football.

10. Following regular bands, not popular mainstream bands, but bands out there just trying to string together shows and get people out, listening and buying their shit, on Twitter makes them step out from behind the curtain. This part of a band’s ascension is no longer a mystery and I’m not sure if this is a good thing or a bad thing. I feel one bad thing about it is that it can fool a band into thinking people actually give a shit about what they’re doing when they’re not playing shows- which for the most part, people don’t care. Although this could be part of a larger problem I have with Twitter- unless you’re reporting news, then I really could care less about what you think or what you’re doing…unless it affects or involves me of course.

11. After Christmas I made the switch back to straight razors after a couple month relationship with an electric razor. Although I’m keeping the electric razor still in my life like Jameson because I don’t do shots of Jameson as much as I used too, but I’m still up for one if the right situation presents itself. The situations where a electric razor proves useful are weekday mornings when I’m begrudgingly awake and face the possible danger of cutting my face open. Plus this will help me conserve razor blades because really, why the hell are replacement blades so freaking expensive? Everywhere- they’re the same price. It doesn’t matter what kind of store it is; you cannot find four replacement razor blades for under $14 bucks. That seems crazy to me. I feel like coffee should be cheaper too.

12. I never thought that I would A) ever eat swordfish meatballs and B) really enjoy said swordfish meatballs. But both happened and it was glorious.

The Wire Project: rewatching the greatest TV show of all time. Again.

After about five months, Future Wife & I finished our Wire Project- taking the Wire, the incredibly great HBO series, on from start to finish. It was Kim’s first time through and what I think was my fifth. The Wire Project was meant to be our winter project, but we took it slow and so it became our late winter into spring and wrapping up in the dog days of summer project. Either way, it didn’t make ending the series any less fulfilling and ultimately sad.

Goddamn it’s an amazing show.

My top five characters listed in no particular order: Bodie, Slim Charles, the Bunk, Bunny Colvin, Avon. How I rank the seasons: season three, season four, season one, season five, season two.

Wire purists will surely deride the fact that we did not finish season two. We started it and got about four or five episodes in, but Kim was losing interest. As the navigator of the project, I thought it was more important to keep her interested so that she would stick with it, rather than be stubborn and slug our way through season two. Everything wonderful and legendary in popular culture- television, movies or music, comes with a hiccup and season two is the Wire’s hiccup. It’s too jarring for a season two; too much of a reach after a breath-taking first season. I understand what David Simon and the rest of his team were doing and I appreciate it. I do. But I continue to make the argument that season two best works as a supplement to the series and if you’re a first timer, skip it and continue on with season three. Then after you finish season five and you’re going through crippling withdrawal, reach back into your drawer and pull out season two.

It’s a win/win situation.

Now the countdown is on until I inevitably start the series again. And that’s not counting rocking a couple episodes of season one or three here or there- because that would be a countdown as weak as Scott Templeton’s journalistic credibility. I told Kim it really was only a matter of time until the right situation presented itself.

Re-watching the Wire is so easy because there is so much too it and like with anything great, repeat viewings just enhances the show, it’s message, it’s characters and it’s nuances. I love that it all comes together and how seamless it is. It’s so complete and totally flushed out- it’s the antithesis to Lost, where you were constantly questioning things. The Wire not only presents the questions, but the situations that prompt the questions, the answers and then the results of those answers. It leaves no stone unturned, nothing left unsaid and nothing open for interpretation. That is something we should not take for granted. Where so much popular culture is lazy and derivative, the Wire is the Olympic athlete of pop culture. It doesn’t take breaks and works for everything. Thus when it ends, when it finally crosses that finish line- it begs that you appreciate it that much more. Those dudes worked their asses off and we owe it to them to admire their hard work.

There is no Line in the Wire, that line separating good from bad, right from wrong, fair and unfair. Omar is a ruthless killer, but we love him. Bubbles, the Shakespearean fool of the show, is a hopeless junky, but we continuously route for him and love him. The Wire makes us like characters like Wee Bay, Snoop & Chris, even though all three are nothing more than hired guns who kill people all day. The reason why we like all these people, despite their faults, is that the Wire makes them real people and they are not just stereotypes. It all comes back to the depth of the Wire. The show lets us see these people in every single light imaginable so we get to know them as more than just their role, their name and their favorite food.

Seinfeld was a good show. Lost was a good show. Mad Men is a good show and so is Curb Your Enthusiasm. The Sopranos at times was a good show and Arrested Development was a good show that ended too soon.

The Wire though, is the only great show and I will literally get into a fistfight with anyone who thinks otherwise.

So let the countdown begin.

See you soon McNutty.

Monday Hot Shots: True Blood, the Phillies, Debt-Ceiling Blues and Tommy Football.

If we were to compare our relationship with a certain TV show with a relationship with a person, than my relationship with True Blood is on its last legs. What was once a fun, healthy- albeit mindless relationship has degenerated into an empty relationship based solely on looks. The clock is ticking.

I love that the Phillies traded for Hunter Pence, a player I’ve always liked since his first game. I even specifically remember talking about Pence with Joe Dykes back at Bay Lines and how we both liked him, even though it was initially because he rocked the high socks. But as the years have passed, I’ve appreciated Pence more and more. But he played for the Astros- so it was like being a fan of a soccer player who only plays for a small West African team. Thankfully the Phillies have made it their business over the past couple years of acquiring players I’ve always liked, but have never really had the opportunity to rout for- Roy Halladay, Roy Oswalt and Pence. They even brought Pedro Martinez back, which was great because I never really liked him on the Mets.

Horrible Bosses was a great movie- funny, not too long, and perfectly casted. However, it was preceded by some of the worst previews I’ve ever seen in my life. How many movies can really start out with the premise- it was the greatest summer of their lives…? Oh and it’s a shark! But it’s a lake! But it’s a salt water lake! We’re doomed, but we’re pretty!

Day drinking gets harder, the older I get it. Actually pretty much anything involving drinking gets harder the older I get. That just doesn’t seem fair.

Kim and I finished season four of the Wire Saturday and even though I’ve seen that season probably four times now, it still gets me in the end. It also makes me believe so much stronger that it’s the greatest TV show ever. They don’t mess around, don’t hold anything back. They give you everything you could ask for. The Wire is the anti-Lost. Whereas Lost was full of questions with no answers, the Wire is situations that lead to questions that lead to reasoning that leads to answers and then lead to repercussions. And they do this for every character- no matter how or big or how small. It all matters. The Wire matters. I can’t wait to start season 5.

How do I tell a potential wedding DJ that I want A) them to play good fun music, B) don’t want them to sing along and C) want them not to be a douche without sounding over-bearing?

Go Karts are boring indoors.

Whole wheat pancakes taste just as good as regular pancakes.

I’ve tried my best to stay up to date with all this fun debt ceiling talk and I guess I’m happy that they’ve reached an agreement- wait, have they?, but honestly, who the hell elected these people? Sometimes I think that as a country, we’re not mature enough to handle a democracy. We had a good run, but maybe it’s time to hand over the reins.

The Patriots look good now, but given the past couple years- I can’t get really excited until the playoffs role around. For the last handful of years, Patriots’ seasons have been comparable to great movies with shitty endings. But I do love Tommy Football.

I’d like to name a dog Tommy Football. Hmm, might have to run that one up the flag pole.