Not trying to throwing anyone under the bus, but Fred Davis’ failed drug tests cost me my fantasy football season.
What else am I supposed to watch on television this time of year besides Christmas specials and movies?
Elf is the new A Christmas Story.
I worry that an entire generation of kids won’t understand the magnificent glory of a Red Rider BB gun.
Watching Tim Tebow throw a football is as ugly as I imagine watching two homeless people having sex in public would be.
I really don’t want anything for Christmas except for someone to pay off my student loan bills.
Tried to watch VH1 Dives Salute to Soul last night but for the most part, watching screeching cats would have been the same thing.
I wish I could make presents for everyone- like a bird house.
Do you think bird’s find bird apartments degrading?
I’m happy Jimmy Rollins is coming back to the Phillies.
How many stupid tweets do I have to write to achieve fame via Twitter?
Just make sure you have a good water bottle is my advice for literally everyone in the world- regardless of the situation.
If the Celtics don’t make the Finals, I just hope someone beats the Heat.
I’m going to watch at least two Clippers’ games this year.
Newt Gingrich probably hates dolphins and kittens.
If I was Obama, I’d be a little worried about John Huntsman.
My New Year resolution is to learn how to tie a tie.
There is a part of me that is starting to get annoyed with Facebook.
There is another part of me that wants to write that as my status update.
Life is less fun when you’re so tired your eyes feel like they’ve just been hit by socks filled with bars of soap.
Showing posts with label Jimmy Rollins. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Jimmy Rollins. Show all posts
Part 15: Baby, it was an amazing summer night in Philadelphia...
Phillies fans- the old ones especially, are bitter, bitter individuals.
Last season, I got in more than a few arguments with old-timers at Phillies' games. Usually it was about Pat Burrell. And it infuriated people even more when I told them that actually, I had just moved to Philly and had recently adopted the Phillies- specifically as my National League team, my second team after the Sox.
That always pissed them off. Frustration showed because they rolled their eyes like dragon tongues and they always pushed their hat back on top of their head, jutting their graying wisps of hairs out like really excited monkeys.
Really frustrated monkeys.
Monkeys that see their checks bounce and monkeys who hate ATMs because really dude, they're just bad news.
Tonight I went to the Philles/Nationals game with the Newlyweds, and despite my bold declarations to Big White in recent weeks that I was really good luck and he was incredibly bad luck, the Phillies played like old waffles. Big didn't go, so ultimately I blamed myself.
The Phillies were flat and played like they had nothing to lose, when really, they had everything to lose. They aren't in first place anymore. They are in second, a game or so behind the goddamn Mets. And watching the Phillies tonight was watching a collection of dudes playing a game for the heck of it.
Not for the hell of it.
It was disappointing, but walking onto the train- the express train, which is completely awesome- I was still happy I went. It was a nice summer night, a smooth temperature and- there is now a tambourine outside and if only it was the circus, if only it was the freight train of amazing heading straight for crazy town...Crazy Town...land of completely paid student loans...
Well that would be pretty awesome.
Pretty awesome, would be a good way to describe the Phillies game if that's how the game actually went. But the game went south, the game was a little bit of a chugging bus route, crossing it's way across the horizon. It puttered and shimmied- shaked like a bad ass dude, until then, yep...the game ended. No more at bats for the Phillies, no more chances.
No more chances to try and win the game.
Dude.
Baseball is only not fun, when it makes you think about how the time to get up and make a move is getting closer and closer, and the times for you to a swing, are getting fewer and fewer.
Thanks a lot Jimmy Rollins.
Thanks.
Last season, I got in more than a few arguments with old-timers at Phillies' games. Usually it was about Pat Burrell. And it infuriated people even more when I told them that actually, I had just moved to Philly and had recently adopted the Phillies- specifically as my National League team, my second team after the Sox.
That always pissed them off. Frustration showed because they rolled their eyes like dragon tongues and they always pushed their hat back on top of their head, jutting their graying wisps of hairs out like really excited monkeys.
Really frustrated monkeys.
Monkeys that see their checks bounce and monkeys who hate ATMs because really dude, they're just bad news.
Tonight I went to the Philles/Nationals game with the Newlyweds, and despite my bold declarations to Big White in recent weeks that I was really good luck and he was incredibly bad luck, the Phillies played like old waffles. Big didn't go, so ultimately I blamed myself.
The Phillies were flat and played like they had nothing to lose, when really, they had everything to lose. They aren't in first place anymore. They are in second, a game or so behind the goddamn Mets. And watching the Phillies tonight was watching a collection of dudes playing a game for the heck of it.
Not for the hell of it.
It was disappointing, but walking onto the train- the express train, which is completely awesome- I was still happy I went. It was a nice summer night, a smooth temperature and- there is now a tambourine outside and if only it was the circus, if only it was the freight train of amazing heading straight for crazy town...Crazy Town...land of completely paid student loans...
Well that would be pretty awesome.
Pretty awesome, would be a good way to describe the Phillies game if that's how the game actually went. But the game went south, the game was a little bit of a chugging bus route, crossing it's way across the horizon. It puttered and shimmied- shaked like a bad ass dude, until then, yep...the game ended. No more at bats for the Phillies, no more chances.
No more chances to try and win the game.
Dude.
Baseball is only not fun, when it makes you think about how the time to get up and make a move is getting closer and closer, and the times for you to a swing, are getting fewer and fewer.
Thanks a lot Jimmy Rollins.
Thanks.
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