33 Things I Know

Tomorrow I turn 33.

At this point in my life I don’t know everything there is to know- I only know some things. Things you know are absolute- they are facts as far as you are concerned. They are bases of discussion, conversation starters, conversation enders, and possibly points of contention. But ultimately they are simply enough, just the things you know.

Here are 33 things I know as of today, the day before I turn 33.

1. I know you can’t beat flip flops when it comes to foot wear.

2. I know the Red Sox will always be the team I care about the most, although this has been less rigid in the past couple years- with the Patriots & Celtics sneaking in there.

3. I know the difference between a $15 haircut and a $25 haircut.

4. I know the Wire is my favorite television show of all time. Arrested Development is second and the Office (prior to season 7) is third. Notable mentions are Lost, Madmen, Seinfeld and It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia. In the next couple years I could see Boardwalk Empire and/or Game of Thrones cracking that list.

5. I know the best hat I ever owned was a green fitted Michigan State hat.

6. I know that after a while, you can get sick of drinking only water.

7. I know that the only state not on an ocean I could live in is Colorado.

8. I know the best job I ever had was being a deckhand at Casco Bay Lines.

9. I know I will always look fondly upon Isuzu Troopers.

10. I know I prefer black ink to blue ink, but I’m not entirely sure why.

11. I know that I really came to appreciate the city of Philadelphia.

12. I know my favorite baseball player of all time is Ryne Sandberg.

13. I know that I never thought I’d have a nickname with more staying power than Burns.

14. I know Life cereal will always be the best cereal there is and if you mix it with Honey Nut Cheerios, it’s a work of art.

15. I know beer tastes best in a cold bottle.

16. I know that sporting a handlebar moustache makes me look angry and troubled, regardless of what my mouth is doing.

17. I know the five best concerts I’ve been to are (in no particular order):
- Pearl Jam at the Spectrum in Philly
- My Morning Jacket at the Mann Center in Philly
- Phish’s midnight set on 1/1/00 at Big Cypress Indian Reservation in Florida
- U2 at the old Foxboro Stadium in Mansfield, Mass
- From Good Homes at the Recher Theater in Towson, Maryland

18. I know that life got easier when I stopped caring what everyone else thought.

19. I know that mix tapes are better than mix CD’s.

20. I know I wish I was five inches taller.

21. I know 75 to 83 degrees and sunny is where it’s at.

22. I know playing music for people is one of the best feelings there is.

23. I know Goucher College might not be for everybody, but it was for me and I have no regrets.

24. I know I actually do have one regret about Goucher and it’s that I wish I had done a semester abroad. I really wouldn’t have missed as much as I thought I would.

25. I know that at weddings I drink Gin & Tonics.

26. I know my favorite place I’ve been to in California is San Diego.

27. I know that someday I want to go to Europe and do the following: fly to London, travel to Ireland and then over to Scotland, then on to Norway & Sweden, followed by taking a boat to Poland, the Czech Republic, Germany, Holland, France, Portugal, Spain and finally taking another boat to Italy. If Greece was included, that’d be dope. But if not, it’s not a deal breaker.

28. I know that I can’t wait to have a dog.

29. I know that for me, coffee just does a job. Taste is secondary.

30. I know Portland, Maine is the greatest place in the world July through October.

31. I know that my next vehicle will be a SUV or a truck. Cars aren’t for me.

32. I know patience isn’t my strong point, but everyday I’m working on it.

33. I know I’m a lucky dude because I met Kim and I had to be lucky for that to happen.

That’s what I know.

Go Pats.

The Future of the Black Keys: two musicians, five questions, one concerned fan

Are the Black Keys selling out?

This question has been stuck in my head since it was announced that their March tour date in Philly was at the big joint- the Wachovia Center. Why couldn’t they play the Tower Theater or the Electric Factory? Are they really that popular or is someone assuming they are or definitely will be in early 2012? Their new album is awesome. That is the only thing that I know for certain about my favorite band.

Here are five other Black Keys-related questions that I've been kicking around lately.

1.) Should we really be upset if our favorite band is getting bigger? And by bigger, I mean fame and size of audience-wise. I don’t really think anyone should care if a band is physically getting bigger unless their favorite band is Blues Traveler and the person in question is John Popper. I think for medical reasons, he needs to stay small. But either way, it is becoming evident that with the release of their new album El Camino, the Black Keys are making a move. The Kings of Leon made a similar move based on the success of their song “Sex on Fire.” Now the Kings are on hiatus after abruptly cancelling shows because a certain front man couldn’t handle his booze. I would be willing to bet that we’ve heard the last decent album from them.

2.) Shouldn’t the goal of every band be to reach as many people as possible? I think so. You write an awesome song; you want people to hear it. A band’s goal should be the accumulation of ears. As ears, we should accept this. But it’s not easy. The more ears a band gathers, the more that band’s sound has a tendency to change. Sure Pearl Jam sounds awesome now, but they strayed for a while when their ear collection became over-whelming. I think the only band to not change regardless of the size of their ear collection is the Foo Fighters. They are exactly what they were when Dave Grohl created them- a loud American rock band that likes to have fun and play kick ass rock shows.

3.) Will the Black Keys be like the Kings of Leon or the Foo Fighters? The Kings didn’t get popular overnight, but they did get super popular overnight. Prior to “Sex on Fire,” they had a decent following and were starting to play larger rooms in the winter and larger sheds in the summer. Then with “Sex on Fire,” things changed and by the time they released their follow-up album, Come Around Sundown, they sounded like a band influenced by Kings of Leon as opposed to a band that was Kings of Leon. Look at Coldplay. They went from writing sad bastard music good for both rainy and sunny days to writing giant, synthesizer-drenched, pop anthems. They didn’t become a band sounding like Coldplay, they became a band featuring former members of Coldplay. Then you look at Grohl and the Foos. Their albums aren’t works of art and they’re not visions of what the future might look like, but they’re dependable and reliable- two things I think every diehard of a band longs for, but rarely gets. Kings of Leon is a local bar that lost sight of what made them great, Coldplay was a pub that introduced outside seating, and the Foo Fighters are T.G.I. Fridays. What kind of bar will the Black Keys become?

4.) Is it cheating that the Black Keys tour with two backing musicians? No. This is a ridiculous question. Who is asking these things?

5.) As a Black Keys’ fan, should you be at all concerned about the future of the band? I don’t think so. I think they’ll be all right. They seem to be genuine dudes with good heads on their shoulders. True Dan Auerbach cut his hair, but I think we are safe from them incorporating super skinny jeans and artfully crafted bedhead into their look.

Rest easy Black Keys’ fan, I think we are safe with these guys.

Check out El Camino, it's damn good.

Ryno-approved bands for next year's Super Bowl halftime show

All morning I've been singing a song I thought was the Black Eyed Peas, but turns out it was Usher. It doesn't matter. No, no, no, no. The moral of this story is not that bad songs get stuck in your head. It's that bad halftime acts at the Super Bowl get stuck in your head.

So while driving to work this morning, it was of all things- Blues Traveler, that got me thinking about bands or acts to play next year's Super Bowl...provided it happens. Now I do not think Blues Traveler should be one of these bands. I don't even know if they are a band anymore- but here was the thought process: 1.) oh shit, it's Blues Traveler 2.) man, they were great live 3.) man, the Black Eyed Peas were terrible live 4.) a band that's great live should play the Super Bowl, not a band that's shitty live 5.) who do I think would be good live?

And as a result, the following list came together- only briefly interrupted by some nerd in a Prius cutting me off, then sitting in front of my in the passing lane. I didn't get upset, but I did think about giving him the finger. Just because.

The following bands/acts are Ryno-approved Super Bowl Halftime acts (in no particular order):

1.) Pearl Jam- fills the quota of a somewhat classic band, they have massive appeal across a few demographics, and rock the shit out of live show. Although I'd be worried if they did play, it'd make my brother-in-law, Fast Eddie's, head explode.

2.) The Roots- maybe not so much on their own, but as a backing band there is none better. Maybe the Roots joined by Jay Z and some other folks in some kind of Roots-orchestrated funk/hip hop/rap review. I think this would be sick.

3.) Stevie Wonder- because he puts on a hell of a show and has some of the sickest backing musicians alive.

4.) The Black Keys- you could say they aren't popular enough, but the NFL used a song of theirs on a clip right after this year's halftime and it sounded ten times better than anything the Black Eyed Peas did. Plus they rock.

5.) Green Day- because few modern rock bands do the stadium rock thing better than Green Day (i.e. the American Idiot tour.)

6.) Foo Fighters- here's a sneaky fact (kind of) about the Foos, almost everyone likes them or likes at least three or four of their songs. Couple that with the undeniable fact that Dave Grohl has become the American Rock Star and these guys could do some damage.

7.) Red Hot Chili Peppers- kind of a long shot, but I think given the chance, they could really make the most of a 15 minute set- with or without wearing anything but either a sock or a giant lightbulb. Plus like the Foo Fighters they've become one of those bands that could also be a band almost everyone likes. Think about. Have you ever heard someone say they don't like the Chili Peppers. *

8.) Bruce Springsteen- because he's the Boss. Because he was amazing the last time he did it. Because the Super Bowl is super American and the Boss is super American. Because he could just play "Promised Land" twice and it would still put the Black Eyed Peas to shame.

Wild Cards: Michael Franti & Spearhead (put on a hell of a show that would translate well to a stadium,) Kings of Leon (America's new favorite rock band for everyone except the creators of Glee,) and Dave Matthews Band (because it's probably just a matter of time anyway.)
* sidenote: I'm shooting to break my own record for use of italics in this blog. Just in case you were wondering.

Bring It Back East & How the West Was Fun.

Went out to Los Angeles, California on Thursday.

The sun was out. Friday it was really hot, maybe 95 degrees, if not a hundred at one point. We were right in the heart of LA- just a bunch of buildings, some interesting and some not. There were a lot of good-looking girls and they put us up in the majestic Biltmore Hotel, a classy joint steeped in glitzy history. It was old school. Really it seemed a little too high class for us- just a bunch of ramblers dodging the bright lights to do the little things. A little after midnight on Thursday, captain called and was talking about brooms. If you held a gun to my head I still couldn’t give specific details.

Things took a turn though; the whole trip flipped. Not in a funny way, a street way, or a gymnastically awesome kind of way. No sir. My stomach flipped. After that, things just got a bit shitty.

The airports brought me home. The planes were simple planes but I kind of dug the functionality of Airtran. I did. They might get my business from now on. I refuse to use the internet while on a plane, though. I don’t care if they make it so you can even use cellphones while flying. My phone stays off. The number one best thing about flying for me is that you have to shut off your phone. God help us if you don’t! That could be the ending message of Lost!

All it is really is a matter of being left alone, being totally by your self. If you’re traveling solo (which I usually do,) there is a certain feeling of isolation to it. It’s just you, dude. There is literally no one else you know around you at all. It’s all strangers from strange lands. All of these good people have a story and a reason why they are where they are. It’s something, dude. It’s substantial. In these turbulent times, flying isn’t a luxury. Most of the time it’s a necessity. It’s happening because it has to, not because it needs to. We’re all on missions. We’re all looking to get somewhere. Looking up at the air vents and over to check out the scenery, because in this light, that mountain range looks downright poetic.

LAX was beautiful and Asian and interesting.

Atlanta was confined and American and interesting.

Philadelphia was ah yes…refreshing and my Kenyan cab driver, after laughing at the potholes, kept wondering- what is the OTHER?

The dark walk through Cambridge St brought on the strongest feeling of God Damn this feels good in a couple days- probably the first since sometime Friday. Maybe I’m just an East Coast dude, I thought. I felt better walking along Cambridge St at quarter to one in the morning than I did on the Venice boardwalk in the middle of the afternoon.

That place though was a freak show. There was botox on the beach, along with medicinal marijuana evaluations- right next to the beehive that will tattoo Marilyn Monroe and Kobe Bryant on your forearm in less than an hour. Because it was Roshashanah, the one Jewish establishment on the boardwalk had a fist-looking security guard sitting out front, in a red folding chair. It’s one of the high holidays, Molly explained, and as a result, there is a shit load of money going into that building. So the security, especially at a place located at such a seedy and downright sketchy locale as the Boardwalk was definitely needed. And that dude better look tough.

My apartment better look like home, and thankfully- it did.

While I would request a do-over if possible, I will also just say, okay- that just happened. That was a thing- a thing that was rare & unique and you know tomorrow is Friday and when the evening comes- we’re just going to pretend that the whole thing was just a dream, another work trip in the books.

And on a side note, the new Pearl Jam album is amazing driving music!

Boo yah! Goodnight, summer! Thanks for coming out.