Fireworks, but we don't know why...

A dude in Biddeford shot two other dudes who were up in his business in front of the dude's house. Dude responded by pulling an unregistered gun from his pants and shooting the two dudes- one in the chest and the other in the back. People in the dude's neighborhood say this was bound to happen and that something like this, two dudes getting shot dead in the middle of the street, was what it would finally take for local authorities to take notice of this crazy dude's actions.

This dude running for mayor of Biddeford was apparently not a big enough move. Nor was shoving carburetor grease in the mother of his child's face or multiple charges of "terrorizing." Anyone involved with a crime simply referred to as "terrorizing" shouldn't be allowed to have a gun or own an apartment building, let alone run for mayor. Even if the town is Biddeford.

America, baby. The land of the free where two people dead aren't two people dead, but a final straw in a maniac's residential status in a shit town in Maine, a state that is pissing jobs down the drain faster than beard hairs falling into Amish ice cream.

It is not known whether this dude's actions had any connection to the death of either Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, Billy Mays or the U.S. occupation of Iraq. It is also not known what this dude thinks of Tom Morrello and why it seems that the guitarist's ultimate goal is not to create unique, politically-charged anthems, but to find a band that sounds similar to Rage Against the Machine, but just with better drums.

Why shoot two dudes in Biddeford? Why not mourn the victims, but instead fault local authorities for not acting accordingly? Why tell the country that you can outrun the President? Why can't you hold a nine run lead going into the sixth inning?

Answers this morning, are lost in the fog and drizzle. Answers this afternoon, will be lost in the third game of the Sox, O's series, and answers this weekend will be lost amidst fireworks, beers, and grillin'.

We don't have time to sit around and mourn, wonder why, and point fingers. This is America & we operate solely in bullet points, not bullet holes. It's not the why or the how that concerns us, just the who, the what, and the where- just the facts sexy pants and the rest will be sorted out later on the back pages and the crevasses of the Internet. The details of the altercation between the two dead dudes and the dude that shot them were not in the article. Just crazy, long time coming, and once ran for mayor.

Bullet points and serenades on a Wednesday morning in foggy Portland, waiting for the sun & waiting for the first pitch. Plungers, hot dogs, and empties and don't we all just really love America in the summer time?

Sunshine & family will cheer us up, I just heard Mom say.

Beers will help.

Not quite noon yet, so beers will have to wait. Safety first, Mom and we'll go from there.

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